Sunday 23 May 2021

The Transformational Approach To Defence Procurement

 
United States Ship USS Zumwalt DDG1000
 
 
Herein we shall outline the approach to defence procurement used by transformationalists to acquire shiny new toys.
 
Littoral Strike Ship
 
 
Firstly the transformationalist sees a shiny new toy in a powerpoint presentation or computer generated image.
 
Royal Marines Jet Suit
 
 
Next the transformationalist declares that the shiny new toy is "transformational",a "revolution in military affairs" and "a game changer".
 
Challenger 2 Tank
 
 
Then the transformationalist condemns combat proven military,or naval,capabilities as obsolete (by which he means unfashionable) to justify discarding them in order to liberate funds to procure the shiny new toy.
 
Boxer Vehicle
 
 
The transformationalist then writes a requirement to justify the procurement of the shiny new toy,being careful to include provisions that no other system may satisfy,such as an incredibly short procurement schedule which eliminates any possibility of developing alternatives.
 
Black Hornet UAV
 
 
Having officially selected the shiny new toy,the transformationalist then scrupulously avoids having it subjected to extensive testing in order to eliminate any possibility that unforeseen problems may impede it's rapid procurement.
 
Ajax Vehicle
 
 
Having procured the shiny new toy,the transformationalist next attempts to conceive a concept of operations to justify it's procurement and failing to do that,invents a brand name instead.
 
Multi Utility Tactical Transport MUTT
 
 
If anyone asks about the concept of operation of the shiny new toy the transformationalist bombards them with vague phrases,buzzwords and acronyms (not forgetting to frequently insert the brand name) until they look bemused or,if that does not work,tells them it's secret.
 
V22 Osprey
 
 
Following years of successful obfuscation,the transformationalist may now retire to take up a well paid directorship with the defence contractor which builds the shiny new toy.
 
Littoral Combat Ship USS Freedom
 
 
With the transformationalist now retired his successors are finally able to prematurely retire the useless shiny new toy he procured,thereby freeing up funds to procure the very latest in military,or naval,fashions.
 

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